Women

[Breand]

you kidding me? If I was 20 again and really looking to bump uglies Id say hell yes. Now that Im married my wife will have to get on without me

[Slamz]

you kidding me? If I was 20 again and really looking to bump uglies Id say hell yes.

I assure you that you don't need to drive for 5 hours just for that. :-p Not unless you live in the Ozark hinterlands or something.

[Breand]

well, Im talking legally heh. I did drive from Long Island to Hood College in Maryland when I was about 22, just to get it on with a gal. But I did stay the whole weekend =) And she was extremely hot.

[Rallick]

Basically if she's not giving you the same courtesy that you extend to her you are getting used and abused.

As for the traveling scenario...hehe. I'm inclined to agree with Breand You only travel that type of distance for that time frame for a booty call and not for 'quality' time!

[Uncle Shags]

Exactly. If I bring the subject up, she owns me. :lol: So I've hesitated until now.
My player friends would say if I bring this subject up then I obviously care about it more than she does and as soon as that becomes clear to her she loses interest and it's game over. I generally don't follow those guidelines but we know it's true.

Yep. This could definitely happen. But, there may be a way to broach the subject so that you don't come off as the "You never want to spend time with me!" guy. I get flashbacks and the shakes just thinking about it...

Maybe tell her you have to take a break (but can still have conjugal visits) because you are at the age where you are looking for something more serious, and she appears to still be in her reckless youth phase. If she really is into you, then she'll put in more effort to keep you. If she doesn't, then there's your answer.

The danger is you may crack under harsh interrogation and admit she's got you whooped. A temporary solution to that is to make sure you have someplace to go right after you give her the talk, so she doesn't have time to put the screws to you.

Or, you could be honest and just say the complete truth. She may be a rad chick, completely agree and decide you are the greatest thing ever. Or she could use that info to crush your soul. But hey, it's only your SOUL!!....

[Dustie]

My opinion is that people need to do what they say they're going to do. It's one thing if something "comes up" for her from time to time or if she's late to an event because she takes forever to get ready. Its another thing if she's simply blowing things off completely. I would drop her like a bag of dirt.

[grizzle]

Yeah the problem is she's in school and a waitress and she's 26. I'm working over-time and trying to get into grad school. She gets off work at exactly the time I want to be asleep by so that I can be up 6-7 hours later and not be dead tired for work. When I type this out reality starts to sink in. So the question is do I continue to sleep with her because she's hot or do I end it now and hope something better comes along?

Her personality type if frustrating, and this is exactly what you should do. Do not get serious about her because obviously you two are not compatible on a deep level, or else you are but she just doesn't give enough of a crap about you to make you a priority to you. Therefore, if she's hot, keep sleeping with her until the time you find a new monogomous relationship to enter.

On a side note, I have found three things that seems to get other women to look at me: if I am with a puppy, if I am holding a baby, if I am with another woman.

So keep being seen with this hot chick, with all the action you want included, because it will give you all the more opportunity to get other chicks to notice and become interested in you.

[grizzle]

Exactly. If I bring the subject up, she owns me. :lol: So I've hesitated until now.
My player friends would say if I bring this subject up then I obviously care about it more than she does and as soon as that becomes clear to her she loses interest and it's game over. I generally don't follow those guidelines but we know it's true.

Honestly, she seems more interested in playing games and not getting/being serious in her relationship with you, so talking to her will only invite her to play more head games or cause her to become disinterested and leave.

Just stay casual in the relationship, play the games back, hit the action whenever you can, and then dump her as soon as you find something more to your liking.

Oh, and if you are the type that buys your woman shtuff, since you know this relationship is going nowhere, stop buying her shtuff. She can buy her own bling from now on.

[Vllad]

Exactly. If I bring the subject up, she owns me. :lol: So I've hesitated until now.

My player friends would say if I bring this subject up then I obviously care about it more than she does and as soon as that becomes clear to her she loses interest and it's game over. I generally don't follow those guidelines but we know it's true.

The above statement is just silly and mostly used by single guys.

Always be honest and always be truthful. Obviously the subject does bother you so that makes the subject legit no matter what her thoughts are.

Lets be honest if a woman makes a man her priority we all know they go all of the way with that. Even with women like Vanna whose carreers are so important to them.

If she makes plans with you and it bothers you when she breaks them then that is an item on your list you find important. If she can't understand that then obviously she is not your type. Find someone who makes plans and sticks with them. As long as you behaive in kind then why wouldn't you say something?

The moron that sits quietly not expressing his thoughts deserves to stew in his own obscurity.


Vllad

[Hoofhurr]

It's totally a silly statement but no less true. Anyway that's sort of ancillary to the main point of the thread. I'll keep yall posted.

[Vllad]

It's totally a silly statement but no less true.

True, however that is a great example of why men don't have healthy relationships.


Vllad

[Hoofhurr]

One day I'm going to discover that monogamy is actually a genetic trait that some men don't share. I'll keep you posted on that too.

[Thudz]

One day I'm going to discover that monogamy is actually a genetic trait that some men don't share. I'll keep you posted on that too.

Vllad and I, and any man on this board with children, is coming from a completely different perspective than those of you who are single with no children or even married with no children.

[Vllad]

One day I'm going to discover that monogamy is actually a genetic trait that some men don't share. I'll keep you posted on that too.

None of us are monogamous. Some of us just have more self control. Monogamy is a quickly learned behaivor after just one expensive divorce.


Vllad

[Dustie]

None of us are monogamous.
Vllad

Don't lump us all in together! I know lots of people who have been monogamous from girl friend 1 through to wife 1 (and final). Cheating, IMO, requires you to compromise your honesty (and that's bad).

Edited to remove horn tooting

[Thudz]

I've been married over ten years and the thought hasn't even entered my mind. It's not even in the realm of possibility. Is that nature or nuture?

[Venganza]

Start auditioning her replacement in your mind there hoof. She owns you a lot more than you own her, that sort of imbalance dooms you to a broken heart.

Oh and as for cheating, i've had the opportunity and the thought has crossed my mind, but the golden rule cuts both ways. Thinking how much it would hurt if she cheated fixed it right up.

[Vllad]

None of us are monogamous.
Vllad

Don't lump us all in together! I know lots of people who have been monogamous from girl friend 1 through to wife 1 (and final). Cheating, IMO, requires you to compromise your honesty (and that's bad).

Edited to remove horn tooting

Just because men don't cheat on their wives doesn't make them monogamous by nature. Men by their very nature and instinct feel the same urges about propogating their seed. Men practice monogamy however men are not monogamous.

If you are a male there are some things that are universal truths about our nature. Unless you have a deep voice for a female Dustie and Thudz your sex is what it is. I don't care how much horn tooting you do you can't change your instinct. You can lie to yourself if you want but I am old enough to know better.

You both can lay claim to great self control but that's it. We are all men here, you can leave the woman speak at the door.


Vllad

[Dustie]

None of us are monogamous.
Vllad

Don't lump us all in together! I know lots of people who have been monogamous from girl friend 1 through to wife 1 (and final). Cheating, IMO, requires you to compromise your honesty (and that's bad).

Edited to remove horn tooting

Just because men don't cheat on their wives doesn't make them monogamous by nature. Men by their very nature and instinct feel the same urges about propogating their seed. Men practice monogamy however men are not monogamous.

If you are a male there are some things that are universal truths about our nature. Unless you have a deep voice for a female Dustie and Thudz your sex is what it is. I don't care how much horn tooting you do you can't change your instinct. You can lie to yourself if you want but I am old enough to know better.

You both can lay claim to great self control but that's it. We are all men here, you can leave the woman speak at the door.


Vllad

You're playing word games now. Go look up the definition of monogamous. You didn't say "by nature" in your original thread either. Further, I didn't say I don't feel the urge to cheat (I don't deny that men are creatures with instincts and urges), I said that many men have never actually cheated and are monogamous.

Anyway, that's not even the point. I'm simply labeling your assertion that all men are not monogamous as wrong. Thudz and I are two examples. Again, you're assertion is wrong. To me, that's not women speak, that's honesty. And to me, the most important part about being a man, is being honest.

Now don't get all upset (i.e. calling me a women) and think that I'm saying "all men who have cheated are assholes." Everyone makes mistakes, I understand that, that's fine. I just want to combat the notion that "everyone makes mistakes, therefore, lets not even try to do better, lets just jump on the it's-ok-to-cheat train"

[Kakarat]

I blame hoof for this, he has you guys bickering like women.

[Dustie]

I blame hoof for this, he has you guys bickering like women.

I agree. Hoof brought his relationship problems to the purge expecting a little free therapy. What a joke.
Doesn't he realize that these boards are restricted to Gaming, Guns, Survival, Knives, Politics, Religion, Anti Virus Software, Pictures, Stocks, Economics, and Farming?

[Slamz]

I agree. Hoof brought his relationship problems to the purge expecting a little free therapy. What a joke.
Doesn't he realize that these boards are restricted to Gaming, Guns, Survival, Knives, Politics, Religion, Anti Virus Software, Pictures, Stocks, Economics, and Farming?

And several of those topics can also handle any woman problems.

[Venganza]

still waiting to hear a female perspective on this one.. starlynne? skelas?

[Thudz]

still waiting to hear a female perspective on this one.. starlynne? skelas?

Skelas use to be a woman. Or did he get that reversed?

[Vllad]

You're playing word games now. Go look up the definition of monogamous. You didn't say "by nature" in your original thread either.

That is exactly what I was saying originally. You just took what I said out of context and ran with it. Go re-read my original comment.

Hoof said" One day I'm going to discover that monogamy is actually a genetic trait that some men don't share."
I said "None of us are monogamous. Some of us just have more self control."

In other words I was saying that no Men are monogamous however that doesn't mean men don't have the ability to control themselves. Somehow you turned this into Vllad condones cheating, or all men cheat. /shrug

I am not playing word games, I am clarifying what I am saying until you understand my meaning.

Anyway, that's not even the point. I'm simply labeling your assertion that all men are not monogamous as wrong. Thudz and I are two examples. Again, you're assertion is wrong. To me, that's not women speak, that's honesty.

Again not cheating on your wife doesn't make you monogamous. Just because you practice monogamy doesn't make you monogamous. Men instinctually are not monogamous and have to learn to fight those instincts to practice monogamy. I have been married probably as long as Thudz and you combined and I never cheated on Vanna. That doesn't make me monogamous either.

This is as factual as gravity so I am not sure how you can even argue the point.

Now don't get all upset (i.e. calling me a women) and think that I'm saying "all men who have cheated are assholes." Everyone makes mistakes, I understand that, that's fine. I just want to combat the notion that "everyone makes mistakes, therefore, lets not even try to do better, lets just jump on the it's-ok-to-cheat train"

I am not upset and I am not really sure what to say about the rest of your sentence.

How do you take "none of us are monogamous. Some of us just have more self control" and turn that into "everyone makes mistakes" and "its ok to cheat"? I am the one saying men can control themselves and not cheat!


Vllad